Here are just a selection of some of the fine real ales available at the GBFBF this year:
Old Larry’s Dead Neck – 6.5%
Pale ale with an aroma that can only be described as Interminable. Kiwi Fruit overtones mingle with a subtle Castrol GTX base to create a drink that can be enjoyed at any time of the day, but not at night.
Drink with: Meat, Fish, Thesauruses, Santa, Breadknives
Cribbins Station Porter - 7.4%
A dark, mysterious drink with subtle hints of chocolate and unsubtle hints of aluminium. Based on a recently discovered recipe for a hastily improvised antiseptic used on casualties in the Boer War. Pleasant on the nose but a terror on the mouth. Not to be taken more than 4 times in 24 hours.
Drink with: Low expectations
Mimsy – 3.2%
Introduced by Greater Brabblesham Brewery as a light beer to appeal to the female palette, all that can really be said about this drink is that the ingredients are mainly air, soap and lavender.
Drink with: Enemies
Chuckle Brothers Brewing Company Elixir Of Life - 4.2%
Drink with: Stuffed pheasant. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DRINK WITH ANY OTHER FOODSTUFF
Denathor’s Bag o’eyes – 4.8%
A combination of dark roasted malts, ginger biscuits, marmite and Hate combine to produce a beer that has been known to crack the porcelain around sinks when spilt. A Christmas Favourite.
Drink with: Caution in a remote lighthouse, sandwiches.